What a crazy, hectic weekend. It's so easy to lose ourselves in the hubbub of Holiday madness. For me, it usually involves extra rehearsals, figuring out childcare, taking the kids off their normal schedule, dealing with the after effects of taking kids off said schedule. Throw in the candy, the egg hunts, and the immense amount of energy my boys have it makes for an incredibly crazy and confusing time.
This year included SEVEN (yes, you read that correctly)...*whispers* "SEV.VEN* services. Oh man...I'm exhausted just typing that. Anyone who is involved in church in a leadership or servant role knows how much time and effort goes into ONE service, so yeah...I'm tired...and throw in the fact that I just can't get my worship on without sweating and MOVING...I got a workout folks.
But still, God peeked through to my heart.
Life has been rough lately. I found out this week that I will most likely be returning to the workforce full time. Gone are the dreams of being a Stay at home mom, of homeschooling my kids, of being the one to pick them up from school and ask them how their day was even...In some ways I am mourning what is about to happen. But I know that God will bless me and my family for following my husband's lead. He has been out of work for almost 3 weeks now. Things have just been HARD since last year, and we KNOW that God has our back, we're just waiting for God to fill us in on his plan. But for now, He's silent...and that's okay...
But last night, He spoke to my heart.
As the communion was passed I took my wafer. Of all the wafers I could have picked, I picked one with a hole. I was a bit distracted at first that my wafer had a HOLE in it. All the way through...I could feel my finger on the other side of it.
But then God spoke to me. Not in an audible voice, but I could feel him speak to my heart. I pressed my finger against that hole. And I remembered.
I remembered the holes that matter. The holes that the nails left. The holes that filled the one in my heart. The holes that wiped every sin clean. The holes that allow me to live my life FREE from sin. The holes that allow me to enter the throneroom of the Almighty God and lay myself at his feet.
I pressed my finger against that hole and imagined that I was pressing my finger into the hole in Jesus' hand. The hole that he made for me.
It is today that I remember that it is not only because of that hole, but because of the EMPTY TOMB that I am able to stand as a forgiven child of God.
Happy Resurrection Day!