I could say I'm sorry yet again for my lack of blogging, but I think I'll pass. This month has been incredibly difficult. First with the loss of our jobs and then with the loss of a friend. Sigh...Satan sure likes to kick you when you're down. But, it's amazing to me how even in the midst of dark times, God reveals Himself with a brighter light then I have ever previously experienced.
In a vocational ministry that is SO taxing on families that it is considered the MOST difficult and stressful type of ministry, so much in fact that church planting has the highest rate of divorce as well as the highest rate of burnout...God protected Mike and I from both. It sure didn't feel like it in the midst, but God brought us back around to see the big picture.
When I was in Middle School I was a part of our Teen Choir at church. We did a play called "The Big Picture" that was written by Michael W. Smith. It was the story of a group of friends who lost their dear friend Leesha. I've thought back to this play often in the past few weeks and can remember MOST of the songs with great clarity. One of the songs, Secret Ambition, talks about Christ's plan to save the world. But, I have seen especially in these past few weeks that my salvation is not God's only secret ambition. He is revealing a new ambition for us right now. Mike and I are just realizing what this all entails, but it is rather exciting. Scary? Heck yes. Faith building? You betcha.
It's only after being drug through the much and then being shown the beauty of the track you walked and seeing the Big Picture does it really make sense. I have seen a maturity in my husband that I never saw before. A spiritual leader like no other man I've ever met. He's taken the high road when most would have gone kicking and screaming and you know? It REALLY has been better for our marriage. This isn't the first time we've had to deal with church politics and it won't be the last. We realize that churches are made up of imperfect people...we're definitely not perfect so why should we expect that of anyone else. We were able to leave a church that will remain healthy and intact. No gossip, no spite...just a bit of anger, but even that will be smoothed over. After all, love covers a MULTITUDE of sins right? We love our church and while we don't always agree with decisions that are made, we do trust and we do have faith that the leadership is making a decision based on a lot of prayer.
I sat through Tuesday church today (I had to play piano)...it is mainly geared towards the older generation, but I love to listen to Pastor Ed preach. He said something today that really touched me. Scripture tells us once that we are to go into all the world and make disciples. It (in essence) tells us twice that we are to love the Lord our God. But, Scripture tells us roughly FOUR TIMES that church is to be a house of prayer. When I think about that in regards to the Big Picture...hmmm...really makes me think that we WEREN'T doing what God called us to do in Palm Coast. After all, it IS about the Big Picture...
Mike is now happy. I am now happy. Natalie is in heaven. Onward and Upward as she would say.